Sunday, May 10, 2015

A mother's note to her child -A pledge

The journey began when I saw your wrinkled skin and creased forehead.My love for you knew no bounds. Deeper than the deepest sea and wider than the vast blue sky.I realised that my heart is made of jelly and could accommodate more and more love for you with each passing day.
You scattered your toys just after a clean up when an ounce more of love seeped into my heart.
You were in your terrible two's on a tantrum-filled day when you dunked ketchup on my favourite outfit.The jelly heart flexed a little more and took in two more ounces of love.
You were five, and I was furious when you rolled all over the supermarket floor when I refused to buy a green coloured toxic looking candy.My heart bulged with an ounce more of love.
Were you nine or ten when you screamed at me obnoxiously in a social gathering? I knew you needed a few more ounces of my love that day.
Many more ounces were added to the love that was deeper than the deepest oceans and wider than the vast blue skies when you slammed the door on my face or burnt your clothes in anger while ironing.
Those incremental ounces of love made a difference every time.My ever-elastic and jelly-like heart will be filled with oodles of love for you when you do something that hurts you or me out of ignorance or lack of positive reinforcements.

But,

if and  when you bully another child

if and when you fail to give respect where it is due

if and when you show road rage or honk mindlessly

if and when you break any law

if and when you disrespect a woman's body

if and when you commit a crime because no one is watching, say 'hit and run.'

if and when your behaviour spells impropriety or solecism,

As a mother, I will continue to love you, but my motherhood will direct the extra ounces of love to anyone hurt by your action. And that will turn the jelly heart into a solid, impermeable steel ball. It is about the alchemy of motherhood.

Steel balls don't turn back into jelly, unfortunately.

Your choice entirely - An expanding Jelly-like heart or a hardened steel ball.

With love

Amma (who wishes for an eternal jelly-like  heart)

Dedicated to all the mothers out there including the ones whose children are out on bail or inside the Jail by mistake of law or fact.

This post was triggered by a famous film personality in India, getting away with a murder.Wondering what would his mothers' thoughts and feelings be ...


Monkey Mommy !

Markata Bhakti and Marjala Bhakti are two ways of surrendering to God. The Cat and Monkey Theology.

Markata Bhakti or surrender is akin to a Monkey baby holding on to his mother while the mother swings from branch to branch. The baby monkey swings along holding ever so tightly to its mom.

One holds on to God in this type of bhakti.The safety of the baby/devotee is dependent on the baby monkey's /devotees abilities to hang on.

Marjala Bhakti or surrender refers to the mother Cat holding the baby by its neck with its mouth. The baby is taken care of by the mother.This form of bhakti is all about complete surrender.The safety of the baby/devotee rests with the mother/Almighty whose abilities are unquestionable.

Intrigued by this analogy,  extrapolated it to a Mother's role.

I  narrated my thoughts, theology to my children, knowing fully well what was coming. Read on.

Daughter: Amma, are you a Cat or Monkey?

I: You tell me?

Daughter: Monkey when the  decision is ours, and you say  " Face the consequences" and Catty when you say "these are non-negotiable."

A good teacher is someone who becomes progressively unnecessary and so would raise kids on an auto-cruise or  Monkey mode.

The Cat style works best until a certain age when they cannot comprehend or take responsibility for the consequences.

Monkeying around, being Catty - the roles that a mother has to play!

However, I would take on a Cat's guise as a devotee.Complete surrender is certainly an easier option for the believer.