I Was truly inspired by Deepika Padukone's disclosure about how she emerged victorious from her Depression. A courageous and bold step. Not many can keep depression at bay. Not many survivors can speak about it openly.
Here I go. Emboldened by her spirit.
There is a swirl of thoughts ( mostly negative ) about our present education system and my personal trauma.Math and I were a classic case of Strict inequality.
Even three decades after passing middle school I still get up traumatised and terrified by dreams about exams. Particularly Math exam. The
That it was only a dream is a feeling - nonpareil! Wouldn't trade that feeling for a googol of wealth.
Mathematics -my biggest fear then. And my biggest fear now. Add to this the fear of water, heights, cooking, cleaning and all, which pale in intensity when compared to this monster that is called Mathematics.
Having siblings who always scored 100% and stood first in all their school and college exams, who passed out with Gold Medals, made things worse for me and mathematics.
I remember praying to all known Hindu deities to give me Fever or at least Madras Eye or a minor bloodless injury - before Math exams. Anything, any debilitating disease which would help me get away with the Math exam.
My prayers were not denied. Only delayed.Invariably they were answered on the last day of the exam.
Yes. I was a victim of Mathematics and our education system . ( do not miss the past tense and the pun.). As a Survivor today, these are my thoughts.
Why are we forced to study something which has no practical application in real life? I do not remember a single instance in real life where I even used the word Calculus except may be at the Dentists'. Forget about its application in a mere mortal's life.
That fire spitting monstrous Dragon - Calculus. It never became an Integral part of my school life and was the primary cause of my Differential achievements in school.I turned out just fine.
Why can't we leave it for the passionate ones and those interested in research or higher studies which require that level of Math?
Why should a person who is passionate about Geography, Liberal Arts, Humanities be tested at the same level as the one who wants to become an engineer, or do post graduation in Maths?
Something is not alright with this system. Basic Math is a critical and essential life skill. No doubt about that. Say up to 8th grade.
After which, there should be various tiers or levels of Math offered to suit the pupil's interest ( read: love or hate ), future academic and career goals.
Jiddu Krishnamurthy's thoughts and opinions on education have greatly influenced me. Profound, futuristic and nonconformist to many .While there are a few schools run based on his philosophy, wonder why there aren't enough and many schools based on his school of thought.
The current trend as I see ...
If it is music, the goal is to go onstage within a short span and never real learning or enjoying the learning process.
If it is sports, it is always the medals and never the sportsmanship.
If it is schooling it is always about grades and qualification and never about education.
If it is about life, then success in monetary terms and the model of your car, your possessions and never about Living.
My heart goes out to all those children having to go through this ordeal. A good case in point is the recently concluded 12th-grade exams by the CBSE board that has left many children drained of their confidence. Apparently the question paper turned out very HOT with majority questions based on HOTS .( Higher Order Thinking Skills ).
Heard all the arguments for and against that paper which left many children in tears.
The happy ones were those who were gearing for higher studies in Engineering who therefore trained for competitive exams outside school at specialised coaching factories.
Needless to say, it was of a much higher standard than the CBSE 12th-grade curriculum.
Not a level playing ground.And again something very wrong with a pronounced incongruence in the level of teaching and the level of testing.
Those who had taken the Commerce, Accountancy with mathematics suffered the most along with those who had not aspired to become engineers and therefore had not done the extra courses of a much higher order.
Not fair at all. It is not about the ability to cope that is the issue here. It is more about the interest, passion for a subject.
I managed to come out with flying colours in all the milestone examinations, but the trauma I endured is beyond words.
Today after 'feeling' successful and happy from within doing what I do, I have no qualms saying " I am a survivor of Mathematics". And this revelation is very liberating as I never let Math define me.
And, success as I define. Not what the society decides as a norm.
Do not continue to be the Fish, which is made to climb the tree to prove its mettle.
Follow your dreams and passion. You will not only reach your destination unscathed, but would have enjoyed the journey too!
"A survivor of Mathematics."
Have quite a few math genius friends. And I am in awe of them. Believe me when I say "I am not a Math hater". Just wish I had a choice then.