Only meant for people with a good SOH. Others: Please excuse. I know you will anyway read.
SOH =Sense of humour, before you let your imagination go back and forth.
Mrs . Groucho is saying Hello to everyone today with a smile. Am I hallucinating, I asked my friend .who muttered, " think it is her new hair cut, I mean style".
Phew ! And don't we all know what new hairstyles can do to our ego. Leave alone Groucho's. We go the length and breadth to make sure everyone notices it and try some deep sea fishing for a few compliments.
If this is the magical power of a new hair cut ..there is never a dull moment in a multistoried' apartment. Just the other day Mrs P and Mrs S were having an argument while my backbencher friends and I got ready for some action packed moments.
Started off with well-rehearsed lines of Mrs .P
Thought it worth documenting to aid apartment -dwelling - moms, with 7-year-old darlings:
Mrs:P - While I know, we shouldn't be getting into kids' fights, you must know how badly my son was hurt by your's with a stick yesterday. In fact, we thought of taking him to a Doctor for a Tetanus injection. ( Calls her son, to show his hurt and takes his right hand to show to Mrs S )'
"But ma, he hurt me below my knees, and I can't find the "boo-boo" now," says the son, the seven-year bundle of wonder.
The usual time -tested escape route for Mrs P would be to, hurriedly dig for her cell phone as if to attend an incoming call.
Of course, the phone doesn't have to ring.
Cell Phones these days come with Silent, vibrator and such other escape modes.
And she did exactly that. Never the one to disappoint us. In fact, one can safely say, "your phone is vibrating !" precisely at that time and get away with it!
Having lived in apartment complexes all my life, I can almost say with gun precision why anybody is saying an out of turn "Hi" or "how are you "!
Reminds me of my college days when we (me and a bunch of back benchers ) used to guess whether it is a 'boxer' or a 'brief ' or a 'desi' version, by looking at a passer-by.
That was a real shocker to my DH. He is yet to hear the end of it.
Here is a representative list, not necessarily exhaustive. ( Under compilation, though )
Tried to give what symptom to look for, the diagnosis which has never failed so far, and a 'silent' prescription to get away from such ills.
- A menacing hi, hello with no smile, means - the domestic help is on leave - Scoot from the scene unless you want to hear a lecture on how maids these days are, and such other clichés.
Take her home for a cup of chai. And drown your sorrows.
- An overtly friendly smile and a boisterous Hello, means- the child has cracked some exam, or won a prize in some competition - Congratulate and listen to "how it all happened when it was least expected.". ( Uh !?)
- Listen, only if you are sure it won't translate into a dressing down for your children. Do you have it in you, to resist comparisons? Otherwise, use one of the time-tested scoot recipes from a cellphone on a vibrator mode ( never mind even if it is drained of charge ).
- A dejected forlorn look, longing for a shoulder to cry on and a weak "'Hi" - means guests arrival! Guests who love to eat your food and enjoy your company too for shopping! Well, all the best there, as it is too tempting not to get into a soul-stirring, mutually enriching, heart to mouth talk!